Saturday, January 4, 2014

Part 3

The question has come up - what the fuck is the narrative for this reality show? Set aside agendas - i.e., showcase Moirville; reaffirm the platonic lie, make a few bucks since this is the sort of project available to them absent a legitimate sports management team like IMG and since the plug was pulled on the deal with Roots.

When you do a reality show, you have a narrative. Until now, the narrative in reality shows hasn't involved out and out lies. It's about reframing context and selective emphasis and sometimes pretending that something is hanging in the balance when in actuality, a decision has already been made or an alternative was never seriously considered - or totally made up.

The fundamentals are basically true; their presentation is radically skewed. Something not so important becomes hugely important/dramatic in the editing. Something routine becomes dramatized (i.e., how the racehorse Zenyatta's habit of staying in the back til she made her run in the stretch was turned into melodrama in the reality show Jockeys).

IOW, the common denominator among reality shows is the PREMISE is true.

I.e. - this is a family. Here's how it breaks down.

Or - these are jockeys and this is the meet.

Or - here are 24 eligible women and one eligible guy. We're going to put them through a lot of scenarios until he weeds the women down to the two he tells us he likes best.

This Tessa and Scott reality show is different. The premise is a hoax. The fundamentals are lies. It's the equivalent of having 24 happily married moms compete on The Bachelor as single ladies.

But it has a storyline. What the fuck is it?

I think I see a storyline, but it seems to be built on how Scott and Tessa believe they're perceived by fans. Which is = golden children. Everything's easy. All the talent. All the looks. All the luck. Natural chemistry not seen in skating since Gordeeva & Grinkov a generation before.

Tessa. Model gorgeous. Once in a generation talent. Guys drooling over her. An incredible dancer and athlete. Courageous, appetite for risk, all out commitment and an ability to immerse herself in performance at high stakes competitions.

So the story in this "reality show" seems to be - none of that is true.

a. Tessa isn't a golden girl. She's an insecure, absolutely exhausting, dreary, neurotic, whiny drama queen who can't cross the street without a crisis of confidence. She's got no sex drive and low self-esteem. She can't let anything fucking drop and is a complete pill. She's perfectly happy to let Scott cock block anybody who wants to date her because she's hoping that some day Scott will become masochistic enough to get with a girl whose idea of a good time is crying into her cell phone and having twelve meltdowns a day. She trowels on the make-up just to hang out at home in her p.j.'s. Her coach has to coax her like a baby to get her to try anything hard. The second she meets resistance, she crumbles. Everything with her is a chore: "Try the lift." "Noooooo." She's hard work for everyone around her. Also? Incredibly boring. Tedious as hell.

"I find responding. To emails. Heh heh heh heh.
Is really stressing me out."

b. Scott isn't a guy who has loved one woman since he was a child. Scott is the stud of Canton, Michigan, and, needless to say, London, Ontario. He's "hot and heavy" with his "pretty new" relationship, but if that chick has one doubt about his relationship with Tessa, over the side she'll go.

There's plenty more where she came from - plenty of girls are available to Scott Moir. He even decides if OTHER guys can get girls chicks. He's got the body, he's got the package, he's got the booty. Tessa's sweet and all, but Scott's a young guy with all the options, and to be honest, Tessa is a pain in the ass.

Chemistry is natural? Hah! They're numb to each other. They can't feel it. They've been doing this since they were children and they just can't react to each other anymore. The physical indifference has become an obstacle to convincing performance. They need a ballroom dancer to come in and coax them to feel each other up and take them step by step faking it til they make it. It's so freaking DIFFICULT. They STRUGGLE with their chemistry.

At least Scott can relax on weekends in London in his model home (I loved the recapper that called it that - the absolutely depersonalized space with the white plates set on the bare table - I think Scott and Jessica's empty restaurant dates had more versimillitude.)

What does this accomplish? Okay they have to work for everything - give them the gold?

They're actually not appealing personalities? Scott's peurile, patronizing and sexist - a wannabe player, and Tessa is hard work?

I'm pathetic. What if he doesn't show up? I should leave.
5 more minutes. If he doesn't show by then, I'm leaving for sure.
I'm such a loser. Why would Scott Moir even want to have dinner with
someone like me? He can have any woman he wants.
Well you can tell by the way I use my walk I'm a woman's man, no time to talk.
What's new pussycat? Hate to keep a pretty little lady
like yourself waiting.
How could you give your love to someone else
And share your dreams with me
Sometimes the very thing you're looking for
Is the one thing you can't see

But now we're standing face-to-face
Isn't this world a crazy place?
Just when I thought our chance had passed
You go and save the best for last

"Snap OUT of it Tessa! It'll never happen! I'm
just fooling myself!"

The magazine said to try this. Oh God.

"Tessa ..."

"Fuck. I blew it."
"You're embarrassing yourself. I'm sorry."
Also. This reality show suggests that Scott's near-lifelong devotion to and uber-sensitivity about Tessa must have absolutely chapped Moirville's hide, and, over the years, they let Tessa feel it to the extent she's compelled to counterspin the whole thing in this reality show. That is some kind of self-abnegation Tessa is engaged in in this program, and absolutely counter to reality. What was the problem? His family couldn't stand that he was so in love/vulnerable to this woman? It burned their ass? It wasn't manly enough?

Next Part 4 and conclusion.

Additional thoughts:

After seeing this episode, I hope anyone who bashed Marina when Marina alluded to Tessa's last season confidence problem now understands that when it come to what she says in public, Marina says what her skaters want her to say.

The obvious: Tessa and Scott have a three year old daughter. A female child. A pre-woman. A future "chick", right, Daddy?

In this show, everyone has agreed that this little girl's mother, a woman the Canadian media has held up as a role model, should portray herself as an asexual, pathetic head case so ruthlessly self-critical she's nearly paralyzed. She gets in her own way and taxes the patience of everyone at the rink from her partner to her coach to her technical specialists. She's discouraged before even making the attempt. She lacks the fortitude to even try. She has to be jollied, babied and shamed into doing it. She takes the blame for anything that goes wrong even if it's Scott's mistake.

Off ice, her self esteem is in the toilet. She has no sense of herself as a woman whatsoever. If there's anything attractive about her to men, she's oblivious.

Also off ice, her partner is involved in a "new" relationship that has progressed rapidly to "hot and heavy", so certainly the MAN in this partnership has no confidence issues. In fact, his girlfriend better be secure in herself because if she's not, she can be replaced overnight.

One reason Tessa is socially isolated is because, it is heavily implied, she has an unrequited yearning for Scott. The problem is she's way too irritating for him to see her that way, although he does feel a little sorry for her. He's just not going to give her what she wants - his romantic attention.

He will, however, control who she talks to, who can talk to her, where she can go and with whom, and he'll speak for her while she stands there either mute or giggling. Then he'll get smug about it when he talks to the camera.

So even though he's not romantically involved with Tessa, that doesn't mean he doesn't control her sexually and romantically.

That stuck out so much in that scene with Chris Mior. It was about Scott and Mior while the women sat there fucking mute, like potted plants, waiting for their fates to be decided by Scott fucking Moir.

Then I look at Scott and Tessa's careers. For the past ten years plus - Marina Zoueva. Different co-coaches and specialists, but Marina Zoueva. Igor Shpilband goes away and they stay with Marina Zoueva. Jennifer Swan is one of the authors of the ground-breaking, innovative Carmen program. Maria Mountain - is the revolutionary (literally) trainer who conditions Scott and Tessa to execute their elements. Marnie McBean is one of their mentors. Mary Branagan got Tessa through her battle with CES.

Who runs the ISC? Alma, Carol, Marj.

Are they proud that so many women have made such a strong contribution to their careers? Is Scott proud that he has probably the most talented, courageous, athletic, competitive partner his sport has ever seen? Is Tessa proud of herself in any way, shape or form - about ANYTHING? Is she confident about ANYTHING? Does she have competency about ANYTHING without first being pushed or cajoled?

Apparently not.

They're not proud of all these women. They're ashamed in the face of the public.  It's zero sum to them, apparently. All these women emasculate Scott.

They should look up zero sum. That's not how it works. All these women don't drain Scott's masculinity. It's just talented people working together. It doesn't have to shrink his balls.

But they seem to be ashamed.

So there's another great lesson for their daughter, along with all the other messages, overt and subliminal, she'll grow up experiencing. You can be a strong, accomplished, smart, in-charge, talented woman. Just make sure you act ashamed of it. It's like something out of the fifties where smart women were told to act dumb so they didn't scare away potential husbands.


  1. Dying laughing. You're nailing this on the head.

    I don't know what's more pathetic and hilarious. The WTF narrative they've concocted involving "neurotic, whiny as hell, and afraid of her own shadow" Tessa Virtue and "Scott Moir, the Wilt Chamberlain of ice dance," or that ANYONE believes what this show is trying to sell as "the real Tessa and Scott." LOL.

    1. There are quite a few who seem to believe that this is a documentary and nothing is staged or edited. VM fans on most boards take everything they say as gospel and reject different opinions.
      Though there seems to be a slight change, mostly because of Cassandra. They wanted prove that Tessa and Scott are Canada's sweethearts. That is the sole reason they're watching this. Nobody but Moirville wants to see Scott making out with another woman but Tessa.
      Cassandra is mostly ignored by the fans ( can't wait to see their reactions when we're forced to watch their romantic boat ride in Paris ) and the few who are willing to acknowledge her aren't even sure about her name - is it Sandra or Sondra ? What a glorious start for a model career !

    2. I think for serious skating fans of VM and those who have questioned their PR - were hesitant about this show. They expressed the concerns/pitfalls about the timing etc. After seeing the first episode - if I had to guess these fans' reactions are its worse than we thought. ass...These are the type of "characters" that push the sport - I'm guessing the next episode will be about the high performance camp and the Toronto International Film Festival...I don't expect much...let's see how this plays out when they show Skate Canada...

    3. You also have to wonder whether Canada's sweethearts is no longer used in future articles...and whether they will do any further joint promotions...

    4. Scott played golf with Cassandra while Tessa was in Toronto. Did the cameras follow him and his family too or did they focus on Tessa ?

    5. Anon at 11:17 am - I don't doubt that we will see Scott with Cassandra at the end of the next episode as well...

    6. "Tessa & Scott" has Virtue and Moir reinforcing the most erroneous ideas about the sport. Everything they do requires lording it over idiot fans.

      Here, they have choreographer doing no choreography. He's working like an acting coach/psychologist. Contrast to ballroom champ Corky Ballas working with the Shibs, getting their movements bigger, clearer, stronger. One relates to the sport, the other is pitched at the level of soap opera, and at what Moirville considers the salacious curiousity of the Virtue Moir fan following.

      A lot of fan fic writers on fan forum and other message boards ought to have copyrighted their work, because this show is full of direct steals, not only from the material but the tone/perspective. These are the fans they want to enable - the fan fic writers.

      Another thing. I'll have to see it play out in additional episodes to see if it's an actual theme, but Scott is coming off incredibly patronizing, towards women in general and towards Tessa in particular.

      CHICKS? Are you serious? I'm trying to picture anyone else saying that with a straight face.

      There's a lot of dialogue and exposition about what Tessa is like; her weaknesses and hang-ups, and nothing about Scott's psychology, possible shortcomings or struggles, other than he doesn't want to dress like a pussy. Even when we caught a bit about a lift it explained Tessa was fucking up (she was over him so that he was unable to push her up).

      Scott doesn't refer to Chris Mior's girlfriend by name. He doesn't say - he's hitting on Tessa right in front of [name] - hey girl, set him straight! Here, women are who they are in relation to men. That's the kind of the smell that's coming off this thing - let's see if it improves. Two guys talking, Chris Mior doesn't ask Tessa directly if she wants to come to the game, he says it to Scott. Scott then puts him in line and mentions Mior's girlfriend, who's sitting right there, but Scott doesn't include her at all. Yes, it's exposition so it's like soap opera dialogue where the exposition has to let us know who these people are in relation to each other, and saying "your girlfriend" let's us know who she is more than a name. But again, the men are talking ABOUT the women and the women are just looking on giggling.

      They're tremendously oddball; Scott every bit as much as Tessa. Tessa is just ruthless in portraying herself as a complete loser. She's sexless. She's lonely. She's clueless. Her self-esteem is in the toilet. Scott talks like a character out of a 1950s movie. "Hot and heavy?" "You and your rap music?" Not really recognizing or pretending not to recognize J.Z.? (I may have misheard that part - I hope so. It was a bit garbled.) His commentary on gossip and dating? How Cassandra doesn't have a last name, a job or a personality in her own right?


    7. They are deeply weird people, obviously, but they're not comfortable with it. Compare them to Patrick Chan, who also comes across a bit weird. By weird I mean a little bit out of step socially compared to people who are a little smoother. He's a little more self-conscious. These are mild eccentricities that can morph into making somebody interesting, memorable and fun. And at the end of the day, we're talking a spectrum, and being endearingly socially maladroit, culturally out of step, or self-conscious is fairly common.

      Patrick did a video with Bryce Davison around Worlds 2010 where he was funny and odd. They talked about being roommates in competitions and how they'll always be roommates until they get married and Patrick said something like "You mean to each other?" like he was confused. But he said it. He didn't get embarrassed when Davison explained. Patrick will talk about what's unusual about his life and in his training. He's gotten a lot of flak on message boards for having crazy eyes or not being smooth, but I respect so much that he's not TRYING to be smooth. He's himself and we can figure it out for ourselves.

      Scott and Tessa are obsessed with how they come across to us, but they have to protect themselves by treating us with contempt at the same time. I think that's what's going on.

      They're trying to get on top of who they think WE think they are, or get on top of and ahead of what they think are weak or shameful qualities in themselves. Tessa's too talented, too smart, too beautiful? Get her on this show running herself down to where Edith Crawley looks like an egomaniac. Great role modeling for girls there, Tessa. All that you've accomplished in the sport, all you have going for yourself and you're full of shame because you're pining after your partner. I'm a little girl looking at this, I see her in this show, and how she's treated, how she speaks of herself, I see the patronizing/condescending way Scott speaks of and relates to her (she's his property, he decides what she can do and can't do, he smirks on camera about their "complicated" relationship, he decides if she can get laid or not, and she accepts that, but he doesn't want to fuck her himself even though she's pining after him, and she accepts that too), and I feel really good about myself. What's the role model part of this woman? She's always camera-ready? She says please and thank you?

      What a role model. Beautiful, accomplished, college-student Tessa Virtue feels like a worthless, terrified piece of shit, insecure around her douchetard of a partner, who is a controlling asshole about her personal life, and apparently her boss. She's too neurotic to think for herself. What chance do I have?

      In real life, Scott's slightly built, a bit eccentric himself, and madly in love with Tessa from day one, and apparently because that made him - oh the humanity, oh my fucking God, how unmanly - VULNERABLE? We must portray him here as a condescending, self-satisfied, posturing ass towards the "chicks", his partner, and everybody else.


    8. Thank you! This is a huge problem with the show and I'm afraid it's only going to get worse. Until now, everything we've seen says that Scott is incredibly respectful of Tessa and supports her through everything. He's very sweet and caring. This is making him into a monster.

    9. Anon at 12:08 pm - couldn't agree more. In the end - he will get the asshole edit. I remember a couple of years ago, Johnny Weir said after one of Yuna Kim's skating shows - that Scott is a happy go lucky guy - it was complimentary. Jeff Buttle was quoted last year saying that he would pick Scott Moir as a partner if he was going to be in an edition of the Amazing Race. Maia Shibutani was quoted saying that when the Shibs first came to Canton and were the new kids on the block - it was Scott who made them comfortable.
      Also let's face it - if there was one guy in Canton who probably does ballet - it would be Scott and he did it years enough with the male macho persona...and if he was that difficult - why would he agree to be trained by a female trainer (Maria Mountain) for a while now...
      Lastly, if Scott was this monster - why did he agree to do Funny Face as an FD? That had Tessa written all over it...

    10. Also, it was SCOTT who fucked up the twizzles in Quebec but here we have Tessa facing the camera and saying it was her.

      I don't think we're meant to see Scott as a monster, or incredibly sexist and obnoxious and controlling about Tessa while also making clear Tessa gets on his nerves. That's how it's coming across, but that's what happens when people overcompensate - they overshoot the mark and it's overkill. That's what we've got here.

      We're supposed to see him as this in-control, confident, masculine guy with a healthy sex life, BUT, also in a situation where there's a thread of hope maybe some day he'll see his loser, irritating partner as a romantic option.

      In the meantime he shows tremendous tolerance and patience towards the boring, tedious Tessa, and is pretty much counting the days til he can be free of her.

      In the meantime,Tessa is keeping herself busy and trying not to dwell on her unrequited love. She's got plenty of other stuff to dwell on anyway, like how much she SUCKS.


    11. It just shows that Moirville isn't comfortable with who Scott is. He does and has done ballet. He has loved one woman since childhood - a very strong-minded, extraordinarily talented woman with an appetite for risk and a competitive drive as strong as his own. She's also beautiful and independent.

      Scott reads. He's close to many talented women, such as Marina Zoueva and Maria Mountain. He's close to gay men, like Jeff Buttle. His female relatives run the Ilderton Skating Club.

      How emasculating!

      All of that is rejected in this reality show in favor of punishing Tessa for her beauty, talent and brilliance, in favor of portraying Scott in the mold of some macho provincial asshole who doesn't think women even have fucking voices or opinions and can't decide for themselves who to speak with or date. Women - kind of annoying. And certainly voiceless. The "gets on his nerves" thread running through this show was definitely feminine. Marina. Tessa.

      Women should just shut up, sit there and let the men decide what they should be doing. Men, meanwhile, are all casual and confident and breezy (Cassandra has a problem with Tessa? Well, there's always a Cassandra out there for Scott, isn't there? He can always switch em out!) except when it comes to each other and then it's whose is bigger.

      Also, don't forget "the chicks" can't handle seeing Scott Moir in velour pants.

      In this show Tessa's a fucking idiot who taxes the patience of everyone around her, can't get out of her own way, is self-conscious and has pathetically low self-esteem.

      Alright, but it's how we're shown that Scott both has his own love life apart from Tessa but then controls who can speak to Tessa, who can go out with Tessa, right in front of fucking Tessa who just giggles like a moron. This is supposed to be cute.

    12. OC - I have to laugh...yes I can see Tessa being a perfectionist and being hard on herself but hell she ain't no doormat, lol...she has been known to give a couple of death stares...One memorable one was in a bus with skaters (Miko Ando, Adam Rippon, Jeff Buttle, Evan Lysacek, Joannie Rochette, Stephane Lambiel)..anyways long story short Evan Lysacek received a birthday card and then someone said perhaps they should sing happy birthday to Evan and Scott said something like Stephane can sing like Britney bitch...and then Tessa turned around and gave Scott the look of was yeah..the ridiculousness of this show is funny...

    13. If Scott is supposed to appear masculine, why is he made up like a drag queen?

    14. 1:33 - that just makes the whole thing so pathetic. And the lighting behind him makes the hair around the right side of his face glint like a gold earring.

      Nothing wrong with looking pretty. But there's all this smug about how Scott's hot and heavy with Cassandra but also completely controls Tessa sexually, romantically and socially while rejecting her as a love interest for himself. He's a tough guy who keeps other guys in line. And while he's smirking about his classic masculine perogatives, his cheeks are gleaming with blusher and his lips are filled in with gloss.

    15. Anon - at 1:33 pm - lol - I don't know what happened there but I don't ever think I had seen such a bad make-up job on Scott during competitions or shows.

    16. Some of it has to be lighting, because Tessa doesn't look so hot in her talking heads either.

    17. Their entire career Scott has talked about the patience Tessa demonstrated in dealing with him. He's running himself down and she never ever agrees that it takes tons of patience, but it's a theme he used to return to again and again.

      In this reality show it's Tessa who tries everybody's patience. Everybody is talking through gritted teeth when dealing with her. We're supposed to believe she's got talent but it's like PULLING teeth to get her to try. It's so freaking degrading, so sexist, so ridiculous and offensive.

    18. "In this reality show it's Tessa who tries everybody's patience. Everybody is talking through gritted teeth when dealing with her. We're supposed to believe she's got talent but it's like PULLING teeth to get her to try. It's so freaking degrading, so sexist, so ridiculous and offensive."

      Tessa's the one driving this bus. She is the one who is choosing to portray herself this way -- to say that this is the real her. This is the image she wants the public to have of her. Interesting.

    19. You're bang on with the vibe this show gives off regarding women. Maybe it being on the Women's network has something to do with it, which is even sadder. When you commented that it's extremely unusual for a reality show to have a false premise, it reminded of I really hope someone, somehow, raises the same questions about this show.

    20. Yeah, 4:21, I'm not sure how much of this is down to Moirville at this point, it seems to be driven by some weird fantasy of Tessa's. The coming episodes will give more evidence as to who's really been behind it.

    21. 4:38 -- It does seem to be Tessa's view she wants of herself. As far as Scott's role, it's extremely sick for any woman to push her husband to create a parallel universe with a fake GF and want him to act it out for the viewers' titillation.

      I think this first show was to set the tone for all the rest. I expect all these degrading subliminal messages to continue and also Scott's acting-out to continue in all episodes. I'll bet we get a scene of Tessa helping Scott choose the (fake) Cassandra Christmas present. All of this seems to thrill Tessa no end. She's sick. And Scott is equally sick for doing it.

    22. Yeah, where did Tessa's view of herself come from though? Not in a vacuum. I can't really get specific but I did get this impression, back in the day, that Scott was their boy and Tessa was her own animal and maybe some people weren't all that crazy that their boy was so in love with someone they couldn't control, who was more her own person than their bitch. They loved her BUT. Everybody had what they thought was a Scott POV. Nobody looks at Tessa's POV.

      There's no way she didn't pick up on that. It's like in Moirville, a woman isn't allowed to have power over a man. May as well cut off his balls. Even if she loves him and he has an equivalent power over her, based on love. It's not even that Tessa EXERCISES power. Just having it because she's loved.

      Go through years of that growing up and where does it come from that Tessa is at such great pains to run herself down? Constantly hype up Scott as the man in this fuckwreck of a reality show? Why is it bad to be equal? Why is equal seen as emasculating?

      And seriously, why the HELL is she claiming the Quebec twizzles were HER mistake? They were Scott's.

      There's a mutuality running through their relationship - the only difference is that Tessa wasn't really Moirville's bitch.

      Here's what I see - in the past, when Scott would run himself down, talk about the patience it took on her part to put up with him (this was a guy with a truly crazy amount of adrenalin, temperment and energy even though he was squishy at the center AND there was a lot about him that was anachronistic) and no matter what he said about himself that was negative, she wouldn't hear of it and immediately rejected it.

      However, if someone (even her) came up with the idea that the storyline here in this reality show should be that SHE's a giant female pain the ass who gets on Scott's nerves and the nerves at everyone at the rink - WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T PEOPLE SHOOT IT DOWN? Why didn't SCOTT shoot it down? Why's he going along with it?

      I can see HER doing it - she loves him, they are both sort of "YOU'RE the best!" "No -you're the best!"

      Who made her feel like she should hide her light under a bushel? Sure she's a perfectionist and a little anal but come on. She's got more confidence than she's showing.

      Why does she have to be run down to build him up? What happened here?

    23. Fuck this. Whoever she is as an individual, what we have in this show is a hugely accomplished, giant athletic and figure skating talent portraying herself as neurotic, pathetic, pining, low self-esteem female who has no confidence in her talent and no confidence in herself as a person all to build up her partner who is blatantly insecure in his masculinity - at least in terms of perception (real life is different). But they CARE about perception don't they. Even if it's really THEIR perception that they blame on us instead.

      That message about Tessa has been getting out there more and more strongly in the past couple of years. To whom is she pandering? Is Kate giving her Total Woman lessons or what?

      Whenever something different bursts through (Scott telling us anyone who thinks Tessa can't play Carmen doesn't know her - and he said it like he was PROUD of it) - bam - it's squashed like a bug in the next news cycle.

      Here's what I see. A gorgeous woman and a less conventionally attractive guy. So the woman has to run herself down, portray herself as asexual or romantically stunted, isolated and lonely, no conception of her own appeal, and the guy has to be portrayed as a stud not only in the middle of his own hot and heavy relationship (that he is ready to discard if his bitch steps out of line), but a stud who controls the romantic and sexual choices of his partner who pines for him, even though he's not interested in favoring her with his own romantic attention. A stud who tells the other men at his training center where the line is.

      She's a freaking potted plant gaping and giggling and saying nothing while he tells some dude who pretends interest in her how it is. What the fuck is this. Then he turns to us and smirks and tee hees and brags. What the hell?

      I'm waiting for the on the rag jokes, the hormonal jokes, because this show is full of the chicks getting on the nerves of the men. Where's the respect?

      Oh I'm sorry - Marina taxes your patience, does she, Scott? What about you and your incredible attention span and self-control over the years? How even-tempered you were, never ever ever moody?

      As I digest this premiere, I keep coming back to the scene between Moir and Mior, and the girls sitting there like they're fucking nothing, while the dudes, but really Scott, sort it out for them. I see the complacent way Scott describes his fake relationship - here's my girlfriend, it's new, it's hot and heavy, but if she has an issue with Tessa it's her problem so I'm not worried.

      Do we need to know anything else about caSONDRA? Nope. The stud has spoken.

      Him and his fucking velour pants. Who the hell is he kidding? On his own team is Dylan Moscovitch and Andrew Poje. Internationally, every time Robin Szolkowy takes the ice nobody cares what about Scott's pants. I think there's a twitter account representing Maxim Trankov's yellow pants. Nobody would ever do a humorous twitter about Scott's pants, because he's too good for that and would spoil the fun.

      Should Tessa be tough enough to say fuck that, I'm not pandering to Moirville's obsession with the health of Scott's dick? Probably not. But she's grown up in that same environment. Figure skating is an insecure sport to begin with.

      Also, let's be real - in Moirville the women DO have the power. But they're provincial, and buy into conventional gender roles, even if that's not reality. Not reality has never stopped Moirville before. As the blog has said, this is overcompensation to the nth degree. It's where when you're overcompensating, you use too much artillery and crush the target.

    24. P.S. - the REAL Scott, the one Moirville loves but is ashamed to have the public know about, is the Scott who is loved. Tessa loves him. His training mates love him. Members of the international figure skating community love him. When he coached, his kids just LOVED him and respected him and trusted him and related to him in the best way. That Scott isn't some patronizing, condescending, superior, smug, controlling, self-congratulatory dickface. It just says something to me, but I'm not sure what yet, that Moirville prefers he present himself as a misogynistic asshole who treats his partner like a joke instead of the man he is. What's wrong with these people.

    25. "Here's what I see. A gorgeous woman and a less conventionally attractive guy. So the woman has to run herself down, portray herself as asexual or romantically stunted, isolated and lonely, no conception of her own appeal, and the guy has to be portrayed as a stud not only in the middle of his own hot and heavy relationship (that he is ready to discard if his bitch steps out of line), but a stud who controls the romantic and sexual choices of his partner who pines for him, even though he's not interested in favoring her with his own romantic attention. A stud who tells the other men at his training center where the line is. "


      Here's what I see.

      A gorgeous woman and an *equally* gorgeous man.

      The man is crazy about the woman, and has been for years. The woman feels the same. However, both are otherwise emotionally stunted, perhaps because of the way they were raised, their community, or I don't know what.

      "However, if someone (even her) came up with the idea that the storyline here in this reality show should be that SHE's a giant female pain the ass who gets on Scott's nerves and the nerves at everyone at the rink - WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T PEOPLE SHOOT IT DOWN? Why didn't SCOTT shoot it down? Why's he going along with it?

      I can see HER doing it - she loves him, they are both sort of "YOU'RE the best!" "No -you're the best!"

      Who made her feel like she should hide her light under a bushel? Sure she's a perfectionist and a little anal but come on. She's got more confidence than she's showing.

      Why does she have to be run down to build him up? What happened here?"

      My feeling is that Tessa did come up with this idea, people (namely, Scott) did try to shoot it down, but Tessa told him to shut up and suck it.

      No way do I believe for a second that she's doing what she's doing because of love and a "YOU'RE the best!" "No -you're the best!" mentality. Please with this. Tessa's about as boss as you can get. It's like Marina said when she choreographed their paso doble CD. Tessa's a matador, not a cape.

      Thing is, Tessa likes to pretend she's the cape. I think it must fit in with her romantic fantasies and character creations she likes to keep in her head. She has this vision of herself that's actually contrary to both herself and the real world.

      I'm willing to bet if you had an honest conversation with her, OC, she would NOT believe she appears on this show the way you think she appears, OC. Not one bit. I bet she thinks she's coming off like a good girl who's figuring out herself and the world around her. Sexist, degrading? Bet those ideas have flown past her completely and she would be shocked by the thought that's what you see.

    26. I don't agree because it's not just how she's portrayed, it's how Scott's portrayed. Smug, know-it-all, in control of the chicks. The two portrayals are dependent. Hers enables his. If she didn't run herself down, his presentation would be more of a joke than it already is. She's not presenting herself this way in a vacuum. The only way his portrayal has a prayer of working is if she crawls.

    27. Also, I wouldn't underestimate how much of the Moirville POV has "filtered" to Tessa, even if it's not said to her directly. If *I*'m aware of it, dear God, she must be aware of it. But instead of standing strong she's pandering to it. It's only make believe, not real life. Why not make them happy.

    28. Scott is NOT "equally attractive". He's just not. As Scott, with his talent, with his charisma, yes. As a physical specimen, he's not. Stick him on the street away from her, nobody knowing who he is, he looks ordinary. Stick her on the street away from him, nobody knows who she is, she's still extremely pretty.

    29. Tessa's the matador, not the cape, and HAS BEEN MADE TO FEEL BAD ABOUT IT. Even though Scott is also the matador.

      That is the point. Scott isn't a victim here. This is HIS family. If you think this wouldn't exist without Moirville, or this is Tessa's show, I think that's completely off base. Yes, all of the individual dynamics feed into the whole but this is not Tessa 100% in the driver's seat pulling this out her ass or her fantasy life.

    30. It's not just Tessa who is getting run down in this - it's other women. Chris Mior's girlfriend was treated like a fucking plant, considering what the conversation was supposed to be about.

      I know I'm harping but I can't get over it. The two men talking about the women like the women were their STUFF. I hate to keep a pretty girl waiting. The chicks will dig my pants too much. Stop hitting on Tessa who is standing right there. Marina can really tax your patience. Marina is going to Champs Camp like she's done ten fucking years in a row only now we're pretending it's getting under my skin. If it were Frank Carroll heading off to Champs Camp how much of this bitchery would we be getting?

      Scott's attitude about his fake girlfriend is not an attitude anybody would have about a real girlfriend. But since she's fake it's okay to glibly talk about her in general - well, if she has a problem with me and Tessa it means the real problem is her and me. Do tell, Oh Great Scott.

      Does he sound bothered, invested, like he gives a shit? He doesn't. There's no respect there or even pretense at respect. Furthermore, and although she's doing it voluntarily, in this episode Hilborn came off like a blow-up doll. Scott may as well have purchased a body pillow and sat down on the sofa. She's just there to show us his penis works and he uses it on something female.

      Marina Zoueva - the brilliant woman who has worked with Scott and Tessa for ten years (and you can hear in Scott's voice when he describes how she's pushed them for ten years that he's near to choking up even though we're distracted by his pretty make-up) - Scott has to mention how she can tax your patience.

      The loud, creative and crazy Jean-Marc Genereux doesn't tax anybody's patience, apparently.

      There's previews insinuating that Scott gets to say things about getting on each other's nerves. We'll see, but it seems to me if you're a female then you can be described as a pain in the ass, taxing someone's patience, getting on people's nerves, somebody that needs the patience and control of a MAN.

      I don't know if we're going to see or hear much about SCOTT getting on people's nerves, taxing people's patience, or having his own hang-ups.

      I wonder how much Maria Mountain is going to be identified, or if we're just going to see her and not hear from her. If we hear from her, Scott better fucking not talk about her as anything other than an incredibly intelligent, strong, brilliant conditioner and none of this fuckery about her fucking female personality working his oh so manly fucking nerves.

    31. OC, I'm so glad you're harping. These portrayals are demeaning and disgusting. No one else is calling it like it is. The idiot blind fans on the skating boards are falling over themselves praising VM's sincerety in being *real.* Do they realize they're saying they agree Tessa is whiney and pathetic and Scott is an insensitive jerk and it's ok to have these attitudes that are from the dark ages.

      This is the only place with the balls to call VM out on their crap and their attitude toward fans.

    32. Tessa's whiny and pathetic, pines for Scott and has such low self-esteem her sexual drive has flatlined. Although she claims to be directing her energy towards the Olympics, she's also paralyzed and self-doubting, resistent and cowardly at the rink. She can't get a lift right, and in the twilight zone of this show she fucked up the twizzles in Quebec instead of Scott fucking up the twizzles in Quebec. She has no libido whatsoever and even her imagination can't get started.

      If women are good at something they should hide it and run themselves down, or they're not going to be appealing. If they're very pretty like Tessa they should be sure to act like they have no self-worth or social confidence whatsoever. And you know what's kind of dreamy and romantic? When some guy who finds her too pathetic to fuck controls who gets to talk to her or date her. Because that means he might secretly like her some day when he gets around to it! We can dream!

      Of course when they DO run themselves down that's also incredibly annoying. Women are just a pain in the ass!

      Even with a super tolerant, super sensitive stud like Scott, who shows super tolerance and patience, we can see him biting down on his irritation when looking at Tessa. He's only human. And hey, he's got a heart! He called her "pretty!"

      True, even when he breathes deep and shows INCREDIBLE patience, we can see that the patience starts to dissolve into feeling sorry for this tedious mess sitting across the table from him, and also he's becoming incredibly bored, but what do you expect, he's just a man and she's pathetic.

      Well, the ladies may be a bunch of patience-testing harpies but at least the ladies get some hot Moir ass in tight velour pants to look at, but wait, nope, guys don't want a lot of annoying chicks looking at their juicy booty meat in velour pants.

      Scott could totally get into Tessa's pants if he wanted to but does he really want to take that on? After he fucked her she'd probably want to hang out and he'd be bored out of his mind. He's got better things to do, like letting his human-shaped body pillow jerk off his forefinger after dinner.

    33. So, what does it take for someone with a platform to take notice like with the Breaking Amish show? It says "questions had been raised", but who does the raising in the first place before it makes it to HuffPo or the Daily Mail? Sounds like it was maybe a local TV station.

    34. Why do you say Scott messed up the twizzles in Quebec? I thought they both contributed to drifting apart. They still got a Level 4.

    35. Tessa talks about the big gap. That was him.

      I don't think they think Scott is getting the asshole edit. This is the romantic edit. He's got a hot and heavy girlfriend but is so controlling of Tessa, making any guy who wants to deal with her go through him, which suggests he may harbor romantic feelings he'll act on some day. That's supposed to be thrilling to us.

      I'm also wondering if they're proud of the sham and that's partly why the reality show. It's nothing but live action facebook, and the facebooks were restricted shortly after the blog started. Not only is it possible to speculate they've got a pent up need for attention/exhibitionistic display to a bigger audience than gets filtered through social media now, but they're using the exact same formula they've used on fb since 2008. Now it's enshrined in "legit media". I think they're proud of it.

    36. Also with the controlling Scott, it's like they're trying to chase down any attribute of their actual relationship and slap a "unique" or "platonic" context/label on it. This is their lives, their actual relationship, and they're warping it for p.r. Real stuff they take and twist.

      BTW, if anyone needs a palette cleanser from Virtue and Moir's histrionics and bullshit, here's people who actually had real challenges. It's a great article:

      And now back to Tessa whining and Scott patronizing and twitching in irritation around anything female that isn't sitting down next to him on the sofa, cooing or shutting up and playing with his weiner substitute.

    37. ^^^ What a wonderful story. I hope the Reynolds get a standing ovation at US Nationals. It's too bad they can't have a television show instead of Virtue and Moir.

    38. Thanks OC for bringing the Reynold's story over here. Nice job by Melanie Hoyt of and someone who over the years has captured beautiful pictures of VM. What an inspirational story and really that's what amateur sport should be all about - instead of the $$$...

    39. I think the Reynolds story shows how much freaking privilege it takes to train for seventeen years at the upper echelon of elite figure skating. Yes, many families sacrifice, but many families sacrifice to send their children to school as well. Or to camp. Or to cover medical expenses or special needs. Many many people get up early to do something before their school or work day starts.

      From almost the day they started skating together seriously, Scott and Tessa have had, not just top coaching, but top everything. Specialists on the ice and off the ice. Costumes from the best people out there. It costs a ton.

      Now we have the Reynolds, who are not on the poverty line by any means, but simply lacked the resources to continue coaching. And when they had coaching, what they'd saved was rapidly exhausted. There is no self-pity in this article at all, no whining or complaining. They're simply a pair of siblings who loved ice dance and couldn't afford it, and decided to do it anyway, by themselves - and what a story. I can't wait to see them at Nationals.

      They're also obviously good enough as musicians to make a few bucks there, too.

      An important point is they're not underprivileged, by any means, which just points out how INCREDIBLY privileged one needs to be to exist in the competitive figure skating environment. They just couldn't afford ice dance coaching.

      For most skaters, that privilege is a baseline. Your parents need money, or you need to come from a skating family, or have parents willing to put into your skating what many families devote to education, special needs, college funds, etc.

      Even for Scott and Tessa with the non-stop freaking whining in their reality show, look at the taken for granted stuff. Oh let's just call in our old buddy Jean Marc Genereux (ballroom dancers are incredibly expensive) - we've been working with him since middle school! We can also afford to waste a lot of time with our neurosis.

      I'm gonna catch a bite with my platonic partner so let's just go into a nice romantic restaurant with the low lighting and the napkins in the wine glasses and the soft-spoken waiter.

      Ask Madison Chock if her life looks like that. She's busy working in the off seaon - actually working (coaching). Not taking Sunday sails, naval gazing, or figure out new things to stress about, nor enshrining her neurosis.

      I don't need anybody who is privilged to apologize for it, because I think it's great that there are so many big talents who are able to throw every resource at their careers so they can develop their abilities to the max. Most elite sports require this type of $$ and commitment.

      But God in heaven please show some awareness - a minimal awareness. Don't make your assets into burdens. Don't fucking WHINE about basic shit people do during the normal course, as if it's special because you're doing it.

  2. What about the 6 periods joke? That one deserves a shout out too. ;)

    1. That was the only time in the whole show I felt Tessa was herself. :)

  3. OMG I'm laughing so hard :)))
    Thanks OC !!!
    They're so ridiculous...

  4. Your commentary is pure gold !

  5. Apparently Ep. 2 is coming up in just a couple of days?

    I can't wait.

    1. The original episode is repeating. I think the new episode airs Thursday. That was my impression anyway.

    2. 9:35--Yuck, these episodes are going to rerun forever. Will there be anyone in Canada not treated to Scott's canoodling with the gf and Tessa's pathetic yearning? This is what VM want going into the Olympics? WHY?

    3. Apparently in the next episode we'll get to watch the "real" Tessa have a meltdown at HPC. One wonders which high pressure situation left her with PTSD that day: the photoshoots or the Thomas Sabo jewelry designing?


    5. Hmmm perhaps someone tells her she has to wear the Skate Canada jacket...

    6. I think her laptop makes her download the updated flashplayer. It's STRESSING HER OUT YOU GUYS!

    7. Tessa made sure to tell us we would see real tears. Why would she say that? As opposed to all those other documentaries with fake tears?

      They are idiots.

    8. Well I guess she said that because they squirted glycerin into the corner of her eyes.

      We may as well use that as a yardstick every time. If they say it's true, then it's the opposite. In every specific, not just in principle.

  6. If Scott needs to exhibit hot and heavy in every show, the way this fanfiction is going it also means the contrast with Tessa's lonely status will be increasingly pathetic.

    I'm putting my money on one of the hot-heavy scenes as the ass-grab occasion. Someone said it was a pose that looked like a kiss set up. Why did Moirville insist this was a great profile picture? They're mocking as usual, setting up for something outrageous.

    Meanwhile Tessa was at some other concert with *girl*friends. It will be portrayed pathetically. Poor Tessa.

    All the messages are gross but along the lines of trashy teen novel. Brilliant.

  7. I think this is fact, "she has an unrequited yearning for Scott." and she is insecure wreck in real life. I don't thin that's story line. why I don't know.

    1. Dave Lease received advance copies of episode two and three and he is excited. That's never a good sign...

      Tessa is giving the judges all the reasons in the world to score her lower. And what baffles me the most is that she's doing it willingly.

      At least PJ still favors VM ( in her overly PC way ).

    2. She doesn't have an unrequired yearning for Scott; she's married to Scott and they have a daughter. They live together. They're a family.

      It's doubly pathetic because everyone who knows Moirville knows they paint Scott as the one who would be staring yearningly at Tessa even when he HAS her.

    3. I alway felt that the story of Scott dumping or breaking up with Tessa when they were kids, and of Tessa claiming all the girls had crushes on Scott, were sort of an ego boost - not necessarily one he required, but just how she rolls with it. It's a story made up to make the perception of their relationship seem less imbalanced (perception is different than reality, obviously).

      He was a loveable but eccentric kid.

      Now I have no knowledge of this part but there's a story Scott tells of sobbing or crying very hard at age eleven when he failed a dance test, and being told later it's no biggie. I sometimes wonder what sort of stress he may have felt when she was nine and at the ballet camp, with her mother and others sort of leaning on her to go in that direction. They were very bonded even back then. I don't know the timing of his test compared to her camp experience, but if they were connected I could well believe him panicking that it would be a strike against him.