Sunday, February 2, 2014

Episode 5, Part 2

Who will get the Final Condom.
"I love coming home. I have a great group
of guys that I grew up with ..."
Who knew Scott was 42?
News alert. Scott has a penis.
Well - maybe not.
Tessa is one rough-looking twelve-year old.
"What do you say if you try to pick up a guy?"
Just FYI, at least two of the school girls in that tub are married women.

Don't come round here with your feminist
nonsense, sweetheart.
Let me tell you how to get a guy.
Damn. She's been so sure of yourself up til now.
Part three to come.


  1. poor browyn (is that how you spell her name?) she actually had a point too bad she was silenced.

    1. I don't think Bronwyn was in the tub. If I'm not mistaken, the friends are Liz, Midori and Chelsea. All three of them have posted pictures with Tessa on social media.

    2. The screencap of Cassandra on skype should have been the part where she made a big show of hovering her hand (right hand) around her mouth. Since she did the same thing as soon as the cameras were on her when she was watching the guys' shooting, methinks we are supposed to read some meaning into the fact she's wearing a ring.

      Who knows what the hell these people are up to, but they're big into pretending jewelry symbols have special meaning in these sham relationships. Scott wore a ring on his right hand throughout most of the Jessica sham and it was clear we were intended to tie that to Jessica. Jessica wore a heart-necklace that also we were intended to believe was from Scott. Then there's the famous key necklace. The same motif supposedly from Scott now to each of the girlfriends. As if in real life any girl would feel treasured and special to receive THE SAME token of love as the previous girlfriend. *rolleyes*

      They're full of b.s. I hope the fans are smart enough to realize even in these details they're being played.

    3. Thanks for the entertaining screencaps OC - Duck Dynasty meets Dukes of Hazzard meets the Housewives of (insert city of preference)...but seriously couldn't they have had Scott visit his bros at a fire department or gone fishing with his grandfathers...hell even enjoy a night bowling, line dancing, gambling at a casino - but no we need to show the guns...this is from a guy who has stated before that he has rood a book or two about UFC fighting and was interested in the fighter's training methods rather than the actual fighting...I think a couple of years ago, there was a cop who lost his life in London and Scott had indicated in an interview that this cop was a real hero rather than him. This guy is definitely more open minded than what is presented in this show.

    4. And holy batman - what's up with the make-up on Scott...

    5. omg anon 12:56 i read your comment as "gone fisting with his grandfathers" instead of É"gone fishing with his grandfathers" and IM LAUGHING SO HARD NOW IM SO SORRY XD

    6. "This guy is definitely more open minded than what is presented in this show." exactly, scott is not the douchebag country bumpkin like the way the show presents him and like the way he presents himself. imo he tries to hard to act like someone he is not.

    7. 5:33. Both Scott and Tessa are trying too hard to act like something they're not. Scott isn't a controlling douchebag and Tessa isn't a brainless pathetic insecure girl.

      The portayals of both are so disappointing. This show is no all-access to reality but to the worst of fan message board fiction.

    8. This is like the 1940s Tracey/Hepburn movie "Woman of the Year". The studio decided Hepburn's beautiful, independent, outspoken, successful character wasn't relatable to the poor female schlubs who buy movie tickets, so they insisted on inserting a scene where Hepburn tries to cook breakfast for Tracey and everything burns, explodes, and overflows.

      Of course, inserting a scene like that was unnecessary and anachronistic even in the 1940s, and said a whole lot more about the misogyny of the studio execs than it did about the movie going public.

      What Virtue and Moir are doing here is telling us what they think of the figure skating public, which is largely female. They can't show the real Tessa - how can we related? We're losers.

      We'll relate to Tessa better if she's presented as an even bigger loser than we are - and let me tell you, in their eyes, we are big time losers.

      Ergo, she's frigid (cause we have no sex life and even though she's so pretty, she doesn't either), insecure, is only hit on by older leering losers or dreary schmoes. She somehow won gold in 2010 but basically she pretty much sucks at her job. Her mommy and her girlfriends are what life is all about, just like us (we all have mommies and girlfriends, right - even if our jobs suck and we're bad at them, and even if we're sex starved and unattractive). Outside of her sport, where she might have some talent but constantly fucks up when it counts, she has no athletic talent, and even if she does, and even if she's pretty, she's going to lose her muscles and her looks as soon as she retires.

      Relate to her now?