Sunday, July 22, 2012

Shame versus Sex

I've defined for myself why the Scott/Jessica sham made many fans gag. Although the photos purported to show private moments, the atmosphere and wardrobe styling were full on walk of shame.
The walk of shame refers to a situation in which a person must walk past strangers or peers alone for an embarrassing reason before reaching a place of privacy.
    wikipedia
Scott's sham experience in a nutshell.

Scott and Jessica often were in a place of privacy while simultaneously under the gaze of all of us strangers. It was difficult to process this apparently shame-based (public) yet private (but not private) experience and know why, if it was so icky for everyone, they insisted on parading private stuff for us.

Scott sported the general mien worn by John Meyer when Meyer had to take Jessica Simpson out:
John Meyer and Jessica Simpson
Scott Moir and Jessica Dube
Meyer was obliged because he was banging Simpson. As a celebrity and media ho, she needs to show she's wanted, and backdoor stuff isn't going to fly with her, not if the guy wants to keep his privileges.

Scott didn't HAVE to "let" "Jessica" constantly parade who he was fucking if he was so mortified, so since he obviously was mortified, why did he? That's why all the Meyer-like theories sprang up.

Sham, Inc. imagined it was delivering something along these lines:
Plausible, innocuous placeholder.
But it was this:
"I felt suffocated, miserable and gross.
I should never have gone down that route."

Ben Affleck
We could tell, Ben.

If what you're doing makes you feel as Scott felt when with Jessica:
I love my girlfriend so much I can't look at her.
("Dad - wtf?"

Scott: Go ask your mother.)
or sitting next to the woman he loves, lying about who they are to each other:



 Not humiliating at all.
You shouldn't be doing it. Nobody should push you to do it, and if you're pushed, no matter how  you love them - no.* All different kinds of integrity took a beating in this mess - the relationship of a partially publicly supported institution and the public is one; Scott's core self, his instincts and values as a man is another. It's not really trivial, even if the latter isn't particularly anyone's business. Still, it was in our face. How could we not notice. It sucked.

The people who love you shouldn't convince you squelch every instinct you own when those instincts have been dead on in the rest of your life. The person you're protecting should figure if you're able to protect what needs protecting in other areas of your shared lives, you're capable of protecting your combined privacy without becoming the face of a desperate-looking and humiliating years-long charade. As fantastic as their professional and private lives have been, that all this is on the record is heartbreaking because it wasn't necessary. It's 100% on them. It's hard to imagine a human being less suited for a sham relationship than Scott Moir, even before you start thinking Jessica Dube is a good idea for him. So naturally, Skate Canada thought it was fab and they glowed with self-congratulation.

While it's not really blog-topic oriented as far as the sham goes (if not as far as how many people who love and know them view Scott) I don't think it's any secret that a lot of people feel this wouldn't be Scott's chosen way of managing things, but he was outgunned. He's the youngest child in his family, the most tempermental, the moodiest, the most hotheaded, the one David Pelletier said should stay quiet and let Tessa do the talking (yes, bot-speak is always better, David), the supposed eternal child, the most aggressive and for sure, the most impatient. Surely all of that should be squashed and he should be squeezed into an ill-fitting sham suit for five years because cooler, wiser heads prevailed. Let the smart, sophisticated people be in charge:



Have everyone you know comment how happy all this looks. Let's have it last forever!

Actually I'm still confused about why, if they actually wanted people to buy the sham, some of these photos were posted. As well as wondering what marketing theory advises that when something is unconvincing, the best defense is overkill.

In public public, Scott was an intense, hyper, goofy, charming guy with a habit of evasion when it came to his romantic life, a guy who clearly had at least a major crush on his gorgeous, charming, talented, intelligent partner and who treated her with undisguised adoration. On facebook it was so bad that even the biggest proponents of the sham couldn't pretend it looked good. They had to make up personal experience of having been in Scott and Jessica's company where, seen in 3D, they were cute, sweet and adorable. It just wasn't photogenic.

I don't think Scott was or is a victim - he's a lucky guy with major wonderful things in his life and was an adult when he agreed to this, and he's a full on grown-up and then some now, and still agreeing. However, I don't believe anyone on the planet, including those around Scott and Tessa but not hands on in the sham, believe he's  the one who put on the breaks about coming clean, who shut every window of opportunity each time one opened. The wise heads, the adults, the parents, in Tessa's life and Scott's life apparently all agreed this was a great idea. Skate Canada is a big fan and driving force. The number of people it took to agree, cooperate and engineer this thing is disturbing when you look at the ratio of adult involvement to level of weird and degree of insanity and how Scott and Tessa enable it due to lack of God knows what - looks like lack of courage to me.
___________________________
*I wonder if there was ever something like: "You don't have to do it - I will if you're too uncomfortable." Considering the size of the posse - Moirs and Virtues AND Scott - when Tessa shammed with Ryan Semple, I'd guess for Scott that alternative would be easier on us, tougher on him. Such a shame there were no third options.

12 comments:

  1. Oh goodness. I had forgotten all about that apple picking album.

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  2. when was the apple picking pictures taken? anyone know?

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    1. I believe it was taken at the same time Scott was in Quebec for the Sophie Richard wedding/group sham photos (2010). They do like to bank photo shoots.

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    2. I seem to remember them showing up late summer/early fall 2010. Maybe it was around the same time that Scott and Tessa were doing Shall We Dance.

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    3. Anon 11:01

      The way these guys banked photos, it's hard to know exactly when some of them were taken. One thing to notice in the apple-picking album is everything about these photos says it's Summer. Perhaps late Summer, but not yet Fall, going by the color of the leaves and they way they're dressed. I think Shall We Dance was late enough in the season the leaves would already be changing colors.

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    4. Well apple picking in Quebec is usually in September until early October. I am not sure when Sophie Richard was married but they were probably taken at the same time.

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    5. Apple picking in Quebec is usually in September until early October. Not sure when Sophie Richard got married but it wouldn't surprise me that they were taken the pictures would have been taken over the same weekend...

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    6. Jessica announced she was going to Old Quebec for dinner with her family an her amoureux in July 2010, and shortly after (still July, I believe) posted a photo of herself, her mother and Veronique in the playground where we see Scott on the slide, Jessica wearing what she's wearing in the sham photos. Veronique has on the same stuff too that she wore in Jessica's profile pic. It makes sense this would be around Sophie Richard's wedding.

      The apples don't look especially ripe to me. It doesn't really matter when apple picking season may be, you can pay up, take the bags and pose. OTOH, perhaps the playground was the wedding and the apple picking was an add on to the Xmas shoot. Maybe they did that earlier than usual. It was a bit bizarre that Jessica pops up for a cameo in Carol Moir's "Xmas 2010" facebook album, and posts her Xmas travel progress (to London/Ilderton) in December, but the following week suddenly it's Xmas in Quebec. Look at Carol's album - Scott was in two places at once.

      Is this shit on purpose? Yes, but why? "We're shamming, but we don't really want you to believe it? We just want to tap dance til we're ready to cash in?"

      Or is it brain damage?

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  3. This post is just sad. I've been in agreement with this blog that the sham itself is deserving of censure, but I'm glad to see a post that reminds us it's still about some real people (Scott and Tessa) who are nice kids and have some wonderful character qualities. It's sad to see those great qualities being shoved aside to make room for something that in the end is demeaning and shameful. Lying never achieved anything good and this is no exception, no matter how they were led to believe otherwise.

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    1. These lies do seem to have been demeaning and shameful for Scott but apparently not for Jessica. Maybe Tessa thinks she benefited, since obviously she remained somewhat "hidden" but I'd also argue it has demeaned her as well.
      Jessica, however...so far I see not only perks but no awareness of having participated in something shameful (unlike Scott).

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    2. Yeah, I think Tessa shamed herself. She denied the man she loved as often as Peter denied Christ, for Christ's sake - more. For what - expedience? And how scary is that if you are madly in love with a woman and she won't acknowledge who you are to her publicly? Is it a commitment issue? That last certainly was resolved quite a long time ago if it were ever a fear, and then some, but I could imagine some dread about why she was adamant about not confirming the truth in public.

      I thought one comment posted here made sense - the connection Scott and Tessa feel to their skating, their lack of inhibition on the ice, and perhaps they don't want that spoiled with everyone looking on going whoo hoo. That is a sensitive consideration until we remember how many people know - everyone in their combined circle of families/friends - which is a huge number. Many in their communities. Most of the on-site Canadian skating talking heads (P.J., Tracey Wilson, Beverly Smith), team Canada figure skaters present and past, international figure skating team members who compete with Canada year after year. Coaches. Photographers. Many fans. Many venue folks. People who run the hotels when they stay in hotels. It's not information confined to a select group.

      If they'd admitted their status, or at least taken it off the table and managed the entire subject professionally - then what? People would speculate? Shut the front door! This whole thing goes in circles, there's not a single operating premise that doesn't chase its own tale/contadict itself - or hasn't been violated when it suited. Talk about taking the sacred and making it profane - this was a travesty.

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  4. Speaking of Walk of Shame, Jimmy Fallon has a music special, on Wednesday I believe :)

    Great, but terribly sad post!

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