Tuesday, September 27, 2011

It's Almost Nap Time

Come on Jessica look alive.
There's the special television camera set up to capture the Moir family reaction.* Alma, seated, wiping her teary face. Cara with her hands up - don't know if she's hand-hearting or that's a camera. Charlie's whistling, Danny's cheering. Igor's dad Yuri is possibly back there somewhere chattering excitedly (or someone who resembles him). The sisters-in-law are on their feet.

We can't see Jessica's face. I'll take a guess it looks something like this:

I understand. She's there in the capacity of a stuffed circus monkey.

But still. Two figure skaters you've grown up with, teammates, have just won the Olympics in front of a home crowd.This gig aside - isn't it the least bit exciting?

No. She's counting the minutes til she can put on slipper socks.

Jessica will photograph anything. If she trips and the camera captures a shot of the pavement, she'll upload it. But here her "best bf ever" is winning the Olympics and no camera is out. No extending an arm to snap photos of herself with the family in the stands either, the family she visits in Ilderton about fourteen times a year.** The other family members have cameras. It's not - okay - Charlie will take the pictures. They'll all take pictures.

Not Jessica.

At the Ilderton parade too, she was all:

Eh. It's okay, but other gold medal celebrations
I've attended for other fake boyfriends were better.
There's tons of photos from the day. She never does bring out her camera when riding in the buggy like a high occupancy vehicle mannequin.

Look at all the old middle-aged+ people who made it down to ice level to celebrate with their loved ones. Scott and Tessa posing and chit chatting with the parents.

Meantime, it appears Debbi Wilkes has received word Jessica's walker has been delayed and she requires physical assistance getting down with the others to share her joy.

But - no rush.
* They generally don't have this Moir Camera Special set-up outside of Canada. Which is why Jessica is not in amongst the fam at Worlds, GPFs, 4CCs, etc., when she's there competing.

**It's wonderful how four years of hoax-ifying has created such an obvious bond between the Moirs and Jessica. 


  1. I heard someone once comment that there were actually very few pictures showing lots of the trivia you described from the different events because of Jessica and Scott's wish to be "private."
    I don't know if that's supposed to be the impression conveyed by the lack of all the photos you would usually expect from camera-happy people, but my reaction to that is - Give.Me.A.Break! If the desire was privacy there wouldn't have been any of the multitude of "cute-couple" pictures that were put out with no thought to privacy, discretion or class.

    Jessica is known to be moody, but the lack of connection that is evident between her and the family of her "lover" is weird and can't be simply attributed to moodiness.

  2. It is interesting that when Jessica knew she was being filmed, she would choose to put on such a pouty face. She 'play-acts' enough with all of her facebook couple photos that have been shared, trying (pretending?) to be/look like she is in an adult relationship. But in instances when the public or fans could directly see her as Scott Moir's girlfriend (i.e. the infamous buggy ride), she does tend to look miserable.

    I am not privy to all of her shared photos, as I am not her Facebook friend. However, by judging her looks during public events over the past few years where Scott and Tessa were the 'stars', I have to admit thinking she looked like a spoiled brat. At first I thought, she's young, she doesn't realize yet how showing such insecurity could affect her public persona. But then I thought, hey, this girl has been in the spotlight for years. She has gotta know something about presentation, right!?!

    I am still on the fence regarding the real relationship status of all involved. With that being said, I do appreciate reading all the blogs and comments/opinions regarding it.

  3. Second anon: my impression of Jessica in general is that she is far more suited to the still camera than the film camera. She lacks the discipline for the film camera - shamming or no shamming. She can't sustain the presentation mode. It shows in her skating, it shows pretty much every time film is running. A photo is a second, a pose.

  4. First anon, precisely. Private my ass. If the sham photos were laid end to end and set to music they could be a film short - in two parts. ENDLESS. I may do that some day and bore the hell out of anyone who cares to watch on youtube, but trust me, it would be LONG.

    We can't see Jessica's experience at the Olympics in the stands with everyone bundled up - she didn't take out her camera. Nor does she whip out the camera riding in the buggy. They're private.

    But we can see their feet on a beach. A lip lock that may as well have been captioned "Especially for you, the fans."

    Swimsuits and the cheesiest smarmiest ickiest pseudo romantic photo shoot ever published. The poses themselves were the normal repertoire duos get put through at resorts, the lack of conviction coupled with the pseudo intimacy made them icky.

    Public wall conversations and personal messages posted in front of 4,000 + fans is also not how "private" people conduct themselves, nor is having nothing but you and your fake SO as your profile pic - especially when that policy happens as soon as you restrict everything else.

    I think they spewed out sixty photos per fake Xmas and fake NYE's at the turn of 2010-2011 alone. And the previous year's. All set inside private homes.

    They certainly keep their minds on business when it comes to occasions set aside for photo shoots. I suppose if time is set aside for such a thing and you've got nothing to say to your co-shammer, you snap away. It's not like Tessa/Fedor or other sham situations by other figure skaters, where you can attend a real event, such as a real concert, or go to a real place for dinner, and whether or not other people are with you as buffers, you can actually hang out and talk in between taking photos. If you have no conversation and don't want to spend time and aren't friends and don't care to be, you use the camera as a buffer/silver cross type weapon - and then fans pay the price.

    What Scott is very private about is any candids taken showing him and his professional partner, his younger, wiser "sister". Nothing off ice, not sight seeing, not golfing, not backstage, not traveling, not the bus, not the plane, not family weddings. He'll pose with other friends but not that friend in supposed personal time. All the other skaters with their platonic partners show this all the time on their facebook. You'd think Tessa evaporates as soon as she leaves the ice as far as Scott's concerned. Of course if she attends a Dave Matthews concert that Fedor attends, then there's no problem sending the evidence out to the twitterverse. That she'll do, be seen on the same bus as Scott heading to a practice where they'll skate together - she won't. They have lost their minds.

  5. [What Scott is very private about is any candids taken showing him and his professional partner, his younger, wiser "sister". Nothing off ice, not sight seeing, not golfing, not backstage, not traveling, not the bus, not the plane, not family weddings.]

    This reminded me of that interview where they said they never sit together on a plane. No, not ever. They even request separate seats.

    There, that took care of things. See? Off-ice they go their separate ways even when they're traveling to the same place. This way no one ever expects to get a picture of them together off-ice.

    I thought the idea that they never sit together was pretty far fetched and not credible. Especially in view of other times when they have said they're actually together all the time and they're so lucky to skate with a "best friend." I would never request a separate seat from my BFF. Even the idea of it is bizarre. IMO Scott and Tessa are just terrible liars and they'll lie about everything, even things that have absolutely no importance, like where you sit on a plane.

  6. I thought the recent photos of them in Japan just prior to skating at Yuna's show in Tokyo were a little small bore for an entire detour to another country and an early departure. A couple of snapshots in a boutique, and pose with the book and out front?