Baseball finally goes legit

I've read that Major League Baseball has decided that, due to the New York Yankees having won more world championships than any other team, and due to them being from New York, which everybody hates, and due to a huge payroll, which is unfair, and due to Derek Jeter's smug mug, which is annoying, from now on in title play the rules shall be as follows:

1. When the Yankees are pitching, the strike zone shall be less than half the size of the opposing team's strike zone, with mandatory replay on every pitch.
2. When the Yankees are at bat the foul lines at the stadium shall be squeezed further towards the baselines, and, in the outfield, closer to the outfield, narrowing the field of play.
3. When the opposing team is pitching, the strike zone shall be double the ordinary strike zone.
4. When the opposing team is at bat there are no foul lines.
5. If a Yankee hitter hits a ball "over the fence" it is foul. Only balls inside the stadium may be considered home runs.
6. The Yankees may not attempt to 'steal' any bases.
7. If an at bat on the opposing team makes contact with the ball and the ball touches the ground on the field of play, it is a home run.
8. Disputed strikes and balls will be determined by the noise of the crowd and the opinion of the fans, except in New York.
9. Disputed tags of baserunners will be determined by the noise of the crowd and the opinion of fans, except in New York,

Since Davis White have been cleaning up in pcs, I just want to look at a couple of examples of the best and cleanest, highest quality technique in the world.

Worlds 2013



For instance when the toe of your skate boot slides into the side of the toe of your partner's skate boot and remains there. This is the stuff they show at judging seminars to illustrate top quality spinning.

Charlie's inside edge move there is smooth.
We see all the qualities that established them as
the best spinners in the sport.

Where Alex has gone wrong is keeping a long spine, open shoulders, open hips and straight legs. He and Maia together erred in entering the element with edges, and as you can see, it's impossible to generate rotational speed.

 

When he's in a "sit" position he should be yanking his head to the side, like Charlie does, to force as much rotation as he can, while rounding his shoulders.

 

Also, in the change position, Maia changed her leg position by herself, without Alex hoisting it or getting her started. She's also maintaining that position while spinning without having Alex clutch it or her clutching it herself. This is probably why they're such slow spinners. Also, they skate out of the element, which - lame.

 

BTW  - this was when Alex and Maia were getting points not equal to, but in the ballpark of DW. Subsequently, they've been lucky if they're only 20 points out. I guess the quality of their skating has been reviewed and discovered its not nearly as good as people thought.

 

 

 

I've got a lot to say about this both generally and particularly, but will get to it later. For now,  I think the best figure skating in the world and highest level pcs doesn't look like this.

 

 

This is the curve lift from the US Championships. At least her boot didn't touch the ice when Charlie drops her like a yo yo. Here you can see that she's completely braced by and girdled to Charlie, that he is the one tipping her into her rotation, but most of all, the way he has her arms yanked back going down, and while she's down.

 

I'm going to be doing the mechanics of Virtue Moir and other teams and asking the question- why doesn't everybody else forget about quality and difficulty and just do simplistic, bullshit moves as fast as they can however they can do them? Cheat the fuck out of the requirements. That's what the judges want. Do it, and they'll award you the points of the requirements.

 

Meryl and Charlie are "clean" and "fast" in lifts because the lifts are wrong and primitive and require no control. That's what the ISU wants. They don't want something difficult done with good technique and smooth speed. Do roller Derby, do mud wrestling on skates - just do it fast and fuck the edges. Edges don't matter in ice dance except for the "footwork" part where you have to show a couple of turns for a few seconds in between toe skipping, trotting and leaping.

 

I'm not saying do high level elements roughly. Don't do high level elements at all.

 

I think Virtue Moir, the Shibs, Paul & Islam and Weaver & Poje need to get with the program.