Child Free

The subject of their child is a little delicate for me, although I'm not sure why I feel that way considering little Quinn earned her sham enabler stripes before she even hit the basinet for the first time.

Will this be a fun family story for Quinn down the line? A fun bit of family history - the time Quinn played a role in Scott and Tessa's public career?

Or will it be forgotten as not important and sure to be completely uninteresting to Quinn, as it's been decided it must be for her cousin, Scott and Tessa's own, actual child. The child who is a non-person, up to and including Scott and Tessa's second Olympics. There's no shared experience, no name called out in the Kiss'n'Cry. The child doesn't exist.

Forever after, no matter how it's revised later on, for the contemporaneous record in the first years of this child's life, during mom and dad's historical career -  they didn't exist. They were never in mom's tummy. Event after event, a xygote turned quad spasm.

Mommy was a skater who spent most of her down time at school (so much for a public shout out to private reality for someone to treasure in years to come). 

And daddy? Well this kid can google til they go blind and not unearth a single piece of evidence that they existed in Daddy's world either back then, were part of things just like the cousins, friends and other relatives, who all have their public memento, experience, little piece of Daddy's public history.

You know who will also have their public memento, experience a little piece of public history while Scott and Tessa's child does not? A couple of relatively random girls photographed with and cooing all over daddy in public forums around the times of big, exciting Canadian competitions, proclaiming how they love him and miss him and can't wait to be with him, and daddy posed with them so the public can see. And a bunch of the girls' friends egging them on. The public can see, and YOU can see, because this will be on the web forever. But you can google yourself til you go blind and what will you see? Absolutely nothing. But those girls - those girls can show their grandkids! They were part of history.

You can show your own kids those girls too, when they ask where the hell you are in all of it.

Or you can cue up Grandma and Grandpa giving Aunt Charlotte and Quinn a shout out.

How important is it, really? Isn't private scrapbooking, private photos, private everything more important? Isn't it more meaningful to tell and explain how something was than to have something to show? Isn't it more important to talk about something years after the fact than to have evidence of having participated while it was happening?

If it were important then the other little girls - Quinn and Charlotte - would be acknowledged by Scott and Tessa in public. Instead, they're never mentioned. How did we even find out those two children exist? They're too young to really know what it means, so why bother giving them a Kiss'n'Cry shout out or talk about them in an interview? They're babies. That's why they, too, are non-persons and only have private record of their inclusion in the lives of their celebrated aunt and uncle. It's the private record that counts.

Oh, wait.

The fact that on the public record this child of Scott and Tessa's doesn't exist is interesting considering the public profile of the rest of the family.

Scott and Tessa's achievements and status in the skating world is such a source of pride that many of their nearest and dearest wanted to be part of it publicly.  It wasn't enough to feel the pride in their hearts. They wanted a record of it. Something to look at for years to come  - not just private video/private photos. They wanted public video/public photos, because that is more exciting. It makes it more special.

Scott and Tessa are not "out" as a married couple, but there's a near-infinite amount of public video, interviews, etc. preserving their achievements as a couple - the Olympic gold, the two world titles, the national championships. Of course there's plenty of private material, but the big stuff - winning, celebrating, achieving - is out there for all of history. There they are - together.

I figure Scott and Tessa have decided their child will be a Virtue. It's up to them - they're experts at influencing others by now. Why not their own kid? You shall be a Virtue. And not just any Virtue - you shall be like one of Tessa's camera-averse brothers.

You shall wind up extremely grateful you are a nonentity on the public record of your parents historical achievements.

So the child must be a Virtue at heart - or it's decided they will be.

For the Olympic free dance there was a network camera set up dedicated to filming the reaction of the Moir family. It was hovering up in the stands with them, in their faces. Those seats were jammed. The brothers. The sisters-in-law. For Canadian championships that preceded the Olympics, those people were likewise present, and more. Cousins. Significant others of the cousins. Plus. Represent!

You have to figure that if any of these people were interested in watching the free dance OFF camera, it could have been arranged. They were on camera because there they would be for posterity. They could point to it, show it to people, say - there I am.

Otherwise they could have joined Kate and Jordan. The Olympic family reaction in the stands after the free dance was all about the Moirs. Kate and Jordan got one reaction shot during the compulsory dance, but for the main event they were there, but kept their faces off camera.

So it can be done. Of course, if it's important to you to have your presence recorded for posterity, then you're where the camera is.

So this kid - it's decided the child will be a Virtue.

For Moirs, if it's not fun to be part of it all - to hear your name on TV, then why do Scott and Tessa call out to Quinny and Charlotte? It's special. You feel included. Did these babies even register what Scott and Tessa were doing the first time they did it? Doubtful. Bet the parents were thrilled though. Will the girls look back later and appreciate it? Sure they will.

If none of this mattered, then when people win Oscars they wouldn't call out to their kids. Why do that? Their kids know who they are! They know mom or dad loves them. Hell, if mom blows a kiss they might even "understand' that the kiss is for them.Who needs to hear their name or see themselves? They already know they're important. Why do they need their name called out on stage at the Academy Awards? They'll get to touch the Oscar at home!

But the parents do it anyway, don't they. Just like Scott and Tessa shout out Quinn and Charlotte.

It's special like Charlie White putting his niece on instagram or on facebook. It includes them. It's especially important to be included when your parents are a big big deal. I think Katia Gordeeva understood that when she included her young daughter in so many projects after her fame exploded. It's not famous mommy and ordinary you. You're part of it. You're sharing in the whole thing. You were there. Her daughter didn't grow up to be a famous skater but I think what Gordeeva did was a smart way to manage the height of her fame when her child was a little girl. Her child wasn't an observer. She participated.

You'd think this would be something someone from Ilderton, like Scott, would understand, considering how many Ildertonians aren't even children but still want the public acknowledgement of their participation in Scott and Tessa's story. They're not saving it to talk about later. They want to be able to show it off now. 

It's interesting that this part of things has been weighed - presumably - and the complete erasure of this kid from their parents' public history - a history that can't be recreated or reassembled or plugged in later - that history is all about the moment, all about the now - and then gone - has been decided.

A part of the child's entire life - the child's own history and what the child can show their own children - has been basically taken away, even though everyone else in the family gets it to be part of it in public and it's something they all share. And the new generation has already been recruited. Except for one who is outside the whole thing.

Scott and Tessa's public history and accomplishments loom as such a monumental event in the lives of all these people that we have, among other stuff, this public sham as a record of the importance it plays in their lives and personal histories.

And only their own child is the outsider, a non participant, slated for, at best, long after the fact acknowledgement, but absolutely nothing on the public record acknowleding their existence in the first three years of its life.