Nothing Says "Propriety" Like Equating Your Relationship With Your "GF" To Her Relationship With Her Dad

Ew.



May 2009: Scott and Jessica's Dream Vacation at Dreams: The Photo Shoot That Keeps on Giving (also featuring real couples)



And here is Jessica's 2009 My Year In Photos Collage
posted to the Facebook Wall of Her Gazillion
Facebook "Friends" (a/k/a "fans") ,  Just
In Case We Missed Alma's Album



Coming Soon - It's Spamtastic (2009)

When, contrary to prior custom, one's beloved is spending May training break in Europe with her mom and sister attending to critical matters vital to your mutual happiness in the months ahead, and may also be seeing to a personal refinement, a good partner is tasked with responsibilities of his own.

This is no time for mere r&r as one migrates to the Dominican for a week in early May, along with countless other Canadians and figure skaters.

While soaking in Bavaro sun and Bavaro rum, he must carry out the upcoming season's essential first order of business in the company of a familiar face and her loyal siblings.

Fortunately for our friend, when one wearies of do it yourself photo opportunities, all-inclusive resorts such as Dreams Punta Cana Resort and Spa offer the romantic beach photo shoot. Free. One dons swim attire, is put through poses a la romance novel, and pays $10.00 American for each shot selected for your <3 facebook album, your end of year memory collage, and your many future facebook profile shots, the first of which (along with the <3 album within) is scheduled to be publicly unveiled four months later at the start of Skate Canada's High Performance Camp, soon after the inaugural performance of a romantic, future Olympic gold medal winning free dance. Years of smoking gun profile photos and album content can be stockpiled from one hour's effort - a cost/benefit win/win.

While the main event is prepared, here is French-Canadian figure skater Catherine Miller and her (platonic) friend Roxanne Bourque, making do in their own May 2009 Punta Cana beach photo shoot.

A few of Canada's best

Tracey Wilson, Michael J. Fox, Moosehead Lager, Henrietta Muir Edwards

Also Canadian:



Debbi Wilkes, Pierre Albert Sévigny, the Teddy Bear Massacre, William Thompson



Ow ow my left thigh

Overdoing It

Skate Canada sanctimoniously links itself with Canadian patriotism while treating actual Canadians - i.e., figure skating fans - like idiots and easy marks.

There's also Skate Canada's moronic image management strategems and schemes to have things both ways. SC's allergy to reality and honesty even when reality and honesty would be constructive is, of course, a classic feature of control freaks.  SC's solutions complicate problems, call attention to problems, but as long as the solutions are controlled by Skate Canada, that's what matters.  One wonders if they're living through their famous skaters. Debbi Wilkes' mug is certainly pasted over at Skatebuzz a hell of a lot more than any figure skater's.

The small, not-shin, not-thigh reason Virtue and Moir's free dance wasn't ready won't be revealed.  The longer Scott and Tessa hide, the more impossible coming clean will seem.  Revealing the truth could release the Pandora's box of lies set in motion years ago, ludicrously compounded, and recently, stupidly committed to publication in their book and reiterated in promotional appearances.  Lies that, ironically, conceal normal, very lovely, non-scandalous realities.  Lies that were ovedone from inception, ridiculous in execution, and demean Scott, Tessa and fans.

Skate Canada's hubris is such that this season they've seemingly convinced Scott and Tessa they can fake out not only fans, but nature and biology too.

Everything that fakery was and is intended to achieve for Scott and Tessa could have been accomplished with professionalism, maturity, respect and, frankly, smarter lies.  But, I believe Skate Canada piggybacked its own self-aggrandizing agenda onto its management of Scott and Tessa, and Scott/Tressa feel trapped.  It's easy to suspect Skate Canada enjoys having its fingerprints on every inch of Scott and Tessa's public and private existence.  Isn't Skate Canada run by mediocre former competitive Skate Canada figure skaters?

Skate Canada needs VM more than VM needs SC. Scott and Tessa need to behave like the adults they are in the management of their skating careers and personal lives. Seek sane and common sensical direction out of the merely ephemeral prison SC has built.

Nice new profile shot Jessica, btw. (Well, not new. May 2009)